OMG!!!

lauren's back!!!!

-jan

Links we Like

Ok, so even though there isn't a new episode this week, here is a link to last week's episode of Pot Psychology, taken directly from Jezebel.com. (you're going to have to copy/paste for it to work, because apparently, blogger won't allow embedded video from Vimeo.com) Though nobody in the household partakes in regular drug-usage, all three of us partake in regular Pot-Psychology watch-age. It's a lifestyle, really.

http://vimeo.com/2308452


Oh, and I almost forgot, I walked in on my parents having sex the other day. Um...yeah, that doesn't get less awkward with age, let me tell you. All I could say was, "Oops, sorry. You guys have fun!" What else can you say to the woman who buys your birth control? Yikes.

xo,
V

Santa, Baby

So Thanksgiving is officially over, a fact that was forcibly shoved down my throat today by the sudden explosion of all things Christmas. My new favorite carol (in case you were interested) is "Holiday Shopping's Fun," a jingle Victoria and I had the pleasure of hearing in the car the other day. My mom and I decided to brave the crowds this Black Friday, only to get brain raped by a Verizon salesman, visit three separate stores to find stockings for our mantle, and hit a giant buck on the way home, which totaled my mom's car. Falafrickinla. Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas, particularity the Bailey's and cocoa/peppermint ice cream part. I'm just saying that venturing out to the stores can be very hazardous to your mental (and physcial, as it turns out) health. Which brings me to the reason for this post. I know a lot of you are really worried about getting us the perfect gift for Christmas, a concern that is completely well-founded, so I thought I would make it easier by posting THE OFFICIAL 911 PENN XMAS LIST 2008. By consulting this list, you can not only find us the perfect gift, but you can do it all while spending a minimal amount of time outside your house (a practice of which we girls are strong advocates.) So here it is...


1. The new Macbook. For blogging, of course. And for other things like homework (read: facebook.) Also so my current computer doesn't make me shoot myself in the face, which could happen very soon.







2. The other mac: the big one. For eating.

3. Sexy repairman for all of our household needs a.k.a. leaking roof and leaf raking. Also for escorting to the scary basement.







4. A channel that airs only The Soup 24 hours a day 365 days a year. And instead of commercials, it plays little bite size clips of Jon and Kate plus 8.





5. More soup. But instead of the tv kind the real kind.








6. An extra room in our house so Victoria and hot "i smile with my eyes" craigslist man could have both moved in.








7. Chuck Bass in my mini-bed.









8. A link to the video of Justin Timberlake dancing like Beyonce on SNL. Cannot. Find. ANYWHERE.





So there you have it. Christmas shop your little asses off. And keep in mind this is only a wish list, so if we don't get everything on it it's not like we'll be mad or anything. We'll just be a little disappointed is all. And we might inexplicably stop returning your phone calls. And you might find some poop in your bed.

TTYL(P),*
jan


*talk to you later (probably)

:::edit-changed our settings so now you can comment. tell us what you want and you most likely won't get it:::

what's in my tummy...

It's no secret that I take the occasional trip down Fast Food Lane. I'll do pretty much anything to add a little extra sodium and fat into my diet. Lord knows that the daily Ramen hasn't been doing the trick lately. Anyway, tonight I was feeling kind of spicy so I went to the Taco Bell drive through to get myself a quesadilla. Everything was going smoothly until I reached the dreaded second window. The twenty-something blonde girl working there hands me my little baggy and states (not asks), "You want some salsa-sauce....?"

I let out a little giggle...just a little one. Because at that moment, I was thinking three things: a) hell yes I want some sauce and I can't believe that I forgot to ask. b) it sucks that this poor girl was cursed with a valley-girl/robot voice. and c) "salsa sauce"?! oh my god, just say it out loud a few times and you'll see my point. hilarious.

-"Yes, please."

-"WHAT kind?"

-"Um, whatever your version of medium is."

So she says, in the SMARMIEST manner possible, "You mean HOT."

Excuse me? Whatever. Like I'm supposed to know the difference between HOT, SPICY and FIRE sauce? No matter what order you put them in, those words all indicate the same sort of flavor, not to mention the degree of flavor. Taken aback by the pure rudeness of this complete stranger, along with the ridiculousness of the situation, I reply with, "Um yeah, I guess."

Bitch rolled her eyes at me!!! As far as I'm concerned, that's worse than someone telling you to "shhhhhhhhh!"

What is the proper etiquette when someone rolls their eyes at you? I'm pretty sure the last time I saw an eye-roll with that much gusto was on an episode of "Full House". Aaah well, you can't win them all, I guess. At least the food was good. Have a good turkey day everyone and get ready to celebrate L's return to the kingdom...only 5 days left!

TTYN,
V

p.s. I didn't mean that. I'll totally TTYL.

gobble gobble gobble gobble!!!

2nd Annual Pilgrims and Indians Party: A Short List of Highlights (in order of appearance)...

-Costumes: paper Pilgrim hats, S&E's matching furry cavepeople Indian outfits, C's "I look like I'm going to a Phish concert" attempt at Indian gear, R's "dot" Indian (nice statement, bro), JB's dinosaur pendulum penis, J's turkey gobble and the slutty crotch sisters...

-Hey! That was a great transition...what do you think, J? The Indian names got pretty funkadelic. Among our personal faves are "Hiding Crotch" and "Sascrotch". Is it just J, or is "Hiding Crotch" a misnomer? (zing to me!)

-Full cup Flip cup and the faulty table. Other side, you got annihilated!

-Pin the Gobble on the Turkey. Best. Game. Ever.

-Hand turkeys at the craft table!!! Winner: Choda Turkey. Congrats to the lucky hand that modeled. You win a hand job. From a turkey.

-It smells like peppa up in this joint!

-An ear chomp, followed by many lip pecks. I take full responsibility for my actions and apologize to any who may have been harmed.

-Accidental segregation of Pilgrims from Indians.

-Rounding out the end of the night with mass amounts of Ramen, a visit from Mr. Jimmy John himself and a few accidental booty calls! yum!

Success! Thanks to all you troopers for helping us drink most of the keg and all the brandy.

TTYN,
V&J